A spark of light in these dark times! ABC has released the contestants and it looks like we’re in for an entertaining season, as always. Let’s see what’s in store for us. In alphabetical order, as always:
Alex is 23 and she has the honor of being the first woman of many to affiliate herself with dolphins. Something’s in the water this season (get it?) and Alexis is an “aspiring dolphin trainer.” The rest of her questionnaire is pretty boring and is a continuation on the water theme. Her favorite animal is a dolphin. Her favorite movie is Titanic. She would be the Little Mermaid if she could. Nothing against Alexis, but I don’t see her going anywhere. Except for SEA WORLD!
Angela is a 26-year-old model from South Carolina who also likes dolphins. She seems really into her family, and good for her. Under my rubric of who generally wins these shows (check it out here), she’s not doing too great. She’s not too young – it’s all relative on this show – but she’s not from one of the popular cities for winners, and model doesn’t tend to get you too far, unless you’re Courtney Robinson.
Third brunette in a row! Yes, this is a theme this season, and I’m already predicting a brunette winner. Digging the alternative name, at least it’s not Ashleigh. It ends there. She too likes dolphins and wants to be The Little Mermaid. I can’t with these women. Astrid is 26 and works as a plastic surgery office manager and her worst fears are dying alone and getting old and wrinkly. Something makes me think she’ll be taking advantage of her employee discount.
Now we’re talking! Briana is a 28-year-old surgical nurse who is 5’4. Check, check, check. She’s from Salt Lake City, which would be a bit of an anomaly but could go over just fine. Unfortunately, she also likes dolphins and wants to be The Little Mermaid. Sorry Briana, there can be only one Ariel in the house. Who shall survive?
I like Brittany. I like her necklace, I like the color of her shirt and that she went with racer-back instead of low-cut. Brittany is a 26-year-old travel nurse (I do not know what that is but it sounds cool), from Santa Monica, and she’s 5’2. She also says nothing about dolphins or mermaids on her questionnaire, so HUGE POINTS TO BRITTANY. My only concern is that her hair is too short (oh my god I can’t believe I’m typing this as if it’s a real concern but such is life). Winners have long hair. Like a mermaid.
Christen has some crazy eyes. She’s a 25-year-old wedding videographer based out of Tulsa, OK. She really got into the questionnaire and I’m tired from just reading her answers. If she could break the law, she would hide in a closet in the White House for MONTHS just to see what goes on behind the scenes. She wants to be a “wild mustang” so she can run free. My eyes are on her for some interesting conversations and hopefully DRAMA.
Corinne is our first blonde and I cannot believe we had to get to the Cs before we got one. Look at that mermaid hair! Corinne is tiny and young. She’s only 5’1 and she’s only 24 and she’s a business owner from Miami. I actually like Corinne but I think 24 is too young for Nick, who is 36, and I think Nick likes brunettes.
Keeping Danielle L. at the top of my list for at least an interesting contestant. She has perfect Bachelor hair. She’s 27, owns her own business, and lives in L.A. She likes Chrissy Teigen and so do I. My one strike against her is that she puts Love Languages as her favorite book. I don’t want to hear more about words of affirmation, I got my fill with JoJo thank you very much.
Guys, I already love Danielle M. and I’m so worried that this is the wrong place for her. She’s 31, so she’s actually age-appropriate for our Bachelor. She’s a neonatal nurse who moved to Nashville after her fiance passed away. She is too tall and cool and pretty to be on this show and I do not want the producers to co-opt her tragedy into a short-lived story line. Fingers crossed for you Danielle M.
Dominique is our first black contestant and she’s so pretty! She’s also pretty young at 25, and is a server in L.A. I know it’s not fair to judge someone on a stupid questionnaire, but that is literally the purpose of this post, and I’m just not seeing too much substance in her answers. She wants to have a meal with her grandfather, Jesus, and … Leonardo DiCaprio. And they’d be eating Chipotle, which she makes sure to mention more than once. She looks pretty and fun and I hope she sticks around and makes best friends, but I don’t see her winning the Bachelor’s heart.
Oh I like Liz too. She’s a 29-year-old doula based in Las Vegas, and her answers are interesting. She seems a little granola. One of the things she can’t live without is coconut oil. Is that still a thing? What do you use it for? Her guilty pleasure is pretty gross. She can’t stop picking her nose when she’s in her car. She seems a little whackadoo and I’m all in.
Elizabeth is just fine. She’s a little young at 24. She’s a marketing manager in Dallas, which is a hotspot for winners/runner-ups. She’s got long hair. I think I need to see her move around and speak before I can get a handle on her. Maybe.
Hailey seems really interesting as a person, but she’s a no for me on this season. She’s only 23 and she has short hair. But she’s from Vancouver, B.C., which is a super cool spot and does well on this show, and she’s a photographer. She seems really independent. I kind of want to follow her on Instagram just to see what she’s up to.
Poor Ida Marie. She really got in over her head with this questionnaire. She was unable to name a single book or author that she liked. Not one. Her favorite snack is Cheetos with a pickle. I’m not even sure what that’s about. She’s super cute and super young (23) and I see her getting along famously with the twins in Paradise.
Jaimi seems like such a bad ass. She’s a 28-year-old chef from New Orleans, and everyone knows New Orleans has the best food. She’s got some good substance in her answers, and she says she might be able to bench press her date! I hope she doesn’t do that with Nick. I don’t think it will go over well in such a hyper-gendered setting. Jaimi might be too cool for all of this.
There are two black Jasmines this season. Like seriously ABC? Do we need to aim for name diversity next? Jasmine B. is super cute and she’s a flight attendant, which is a famously “sexy” job that shows she is very adventurous, I’m sure. She’s only 25 and she’s from Tacoma, WA. Not sure why she didn’t just say Seattle, but whatever. I’m a little concerned about this comment: “Do you prefer a man who wants to be pursued or a man who pursues you and why? A man who pursues me. I don’t usually chase men.” That’s not how this works, Jasmine B.
Jasmine #2! Very different than Jasmine #1. This Jasmine is a pro-basketball dancer who is 29 and from San Francisco. I actually like everything about her profile except for her love for Guy Fieri, who is just the worst. I like Triple D as much as the next person but I do not like Guy. Anyway, if I had to pick between the two Jasmines I think I’d go with flight-attendant Jasmine because that job is a more palatable than dancer.
There’s a lot going on with Josephine. The bare-shoulder top with lace, the choker, the dramatic hair, the makeup. She’s a 24-year-old unemployed nurse, which doesn’t scream “CATCH” but maybe she’ll surprise us. Doubt it.
Kristina is young, 24, and is from Lexington, KY. She’s a dental hygienist, which is a good profession for this show, and is also only 5’2, which I think is a positive for Nick. Plus she’s brunette and has the long hair going for her. Her answers to her quiz are somewhat unique (she’d like to be Fiona from Shrek, so at least it’s a different fairytale). She seems a little boring and a little young, and I’m worried about the location. I’m thinking middle of the pack.
Lacy is a 25-year-old digital marketing manager from Manhattan. She seems sweet. Women from NYC never do so well on this show. Nick might be the bachelor to prove us wrong on this, and I’d love to be proven wrong, but I’m not feeling it for Lacey. She seems like she’ll be good friends with the rest of the girls but not hit it off romantically with Nick.
I’m into Lauren. She’s 30, she’s a law school graduate (although I wonder what that means, hopefully she just graduated and is not just unemployed), and she’s super cute. She’s from Naples, FL, which is not a huge source of winners but we’ve had a few in the past (Vienna?). Ugh she also likes dolphins, which is just annoying, but I like Lauren and I think she could be good this season.
Michelle is super cute, and super young. She’s 24 and a food truck owner in LA. She seems really adventurous and fun, and I think she’ll be living up the international travel if she gets that far. I think she IS there to make friends, and not so much there to meet a husband. Which is fine, because she is 24.
Olivia is interesting. She’s 25 and from Anchorage, AK, which is maybe a first for this franchise? She was the kicker for her high school’s male football team, which is pretty badass, but she likes Nicholas Sparks, is afraid of spiders and not finding love, and broke down in tears to the point of not being able to finish a speech when she was the maid of honor. I think we’ll be seeing the waterworks from Olivia this season.
Oh Rachel, this is a woman after my heart. She’s the person I want Nick to pick. She’s a lawyer in Dallas and she’s 31. She’s the right age for Nick, she has a career, and Dallas has been a good source for winners/leads for this show. She’s the right height at 5’4, and she’s beautiful! Her questionnaire answers are spot-on. I want Rachel to go far, I want her to win. She would be the first black contestant to break the top 4. Fingers crossed we get there.
It’s hard to imagine Raven and Rachel in the same room, let alone dating the same man. Raven is 25, from Hoxie, Arkansas (not sure where that is), and is a fashion boutique owner. She seems like a ball of fun. Here’s a verbatim quote from her: Do you have a fear of aging, and are you doing anything to prevent it? No! Oh, I’m sure I’ll use cosmetic procedures to my advantage, but tastefully done. Hey, at least she’s honest! I can see her sticking around as an interesting character, but I do not see Nick ending up with her.
Sarah seems like a sweetheart. She’s 26, lives in Newport Beach, CA, and is a grade school teacher. She seems like a romantic, too. She loves quite flowers and a Walk to Remember. Is she too sweet? I see Nick with someone who has more of an edge. I bet Sarah will make lots of friends though, and maybe even get herself a ticket to Paradise.
Susannah is really cute and has great hair. Susannah says her greatest achievement so far in her 26 years on this planet is flying to Europe on a whim. Oh, and she also loves The Little Mermaid. Did they plan this? They must have.
Taylor is so young! She’s only 23. She’s from Seattle, which makes sense because I grew up in Seattle and everyone was named Taylor. Girls and boys. Two of them dated for awhile in high school. That was cute. Her favorite “clothing designer” is Forever 21. Forever 21 is not a clothing designer, but it almost seems unfair to ask a 23-year-old this question because she has been in the workforce for what, two years max? She probably just started getting a paycheck last year. I just can’t see Nick with someone this young. That’s a 13-year difference, and it’s a pretty big one.
Vanessa kind of looks like Andi, no? And she’s from Canada, so like Kaitlyn! Maybe she’s the perfect combination! In addition to being very pretty, Vanessa is 29 and a special education teacher. She’s under 5’4 and has perfect Bachelor hair. I can’t tell too much about her from her profile, other than family being important to her. I like her.
Whitney looks like a model but she’s actually a pilates instructor. I think she’s secretly a model, or wants to be, because she’d choose to be Gisele for the day. She’s scared of horses, which could lead to some interesting dates. Maybe it’s because I’m at the end of the women, but I’m not feeling Whitney. Maybe for Paradise.
This is the most diverse group of women I’ve ever seen for the Bachelor, and I think that is awesome. I also think Nick has the potential to be a bit of a wild card bachelor. I can’t tell how he’s going to go. From past experiences of his on the show, he has gravitated towards smart, funny, and strong women, even during his time in Paradise. That makes me hopeful that he’ll weed out the 20-somethings who love dolphins and focus on a few of the women who will likely be a better long-term fit for this 36-year-old. I’m not going to rank the top four yet, but here are the women I hope Nick gives these women a chance:
- Rachel. She’s got it going on, and I have a feeling Nick will be ok with a strong, professional woman.
- Danielle M. This woman is gorgeous, accomplished, and hopefully is in a place to find love.
- Vanessa. I’m a fan. She seems sweet, genuine, and grounded. Hopefully she also has a sense o humor and we’re golden!
Let the games begin!