Mea culpa, dear readers. This season has been a little lackluster for me, and my urge to blog reflects that feeling. But the show must go on, and before it does so TONIGHT, here are my thoughts on last week (and a little on the week before).
Over the past two weeks, JoJo has gotten rid of some gems and also finally relieved us of watching Alex and his Napoleon complex. She has since narrowed it down to almost exact clones (and, thanks to Vinny, they’re now all sporting the same haircut):
The FOUR musketeers
I think JoJo has a type. But before we move on to the remaining four, let’s pay homage to the men who have since left.
Goodbye to Wells, who, only on this weird microcosm of a reality show, would be thought of as effeminate and undesirable. I think he was too normal for JoJo. And he didn’t suffer from roid rage, which normally would be a good thing, but not this season. Goodbye Wells, we will miss your normalcy!
He has a beanie AND a puppy
Goodbye to Derek, the only voice of reason in the face of Chad. I really admired Derek up until his very last episode. He seemed to get a little cocky, which I assume was producer-driven. But all that build up leading to disappointment brought us the most epic breakdown yet:
However, Derek did not go silently. He’s been killing it on Twitter lately. This exchange is my favorite so far (which only makes me like Derek more – totally underrated this season).
Is it wrong that I have a maniacal laugh while watching Derek cry? #thebachelorette
— Jenny McCarthy (@JennyMcCarthy) June 28, 2016
— Derek Peth (@PethDerek) June 28, 2016
And GOODBYE TO LITTLE ALEX! It seemed that once Chad left, there was a douche vacuum that only Alex could fill. He became aggressive, whiny, and overcompensating. And he was rewarded with maybe the worst date I’ve ever seen on this show. They basically took a travel day, threw Alex in the back of the car, and called it a date. Alex seriously has borne the brunt of awful producer manipulation this season. Case in point:
Seriously, WHY give him this large chair??
For example, this past episode, Jordan got to go on a private jet, spend a day alone with JoJo wine tasting, and have a delicious dinner (that nobody ate). Alex, on the other hand, had to ride in the back of a car with a tired JoJo, eat snacks from a gas station, and dress as a gaucho:
This outfit is not ok
Alex and JoJo did not even get to cuddle with the weirdly subdued horse in private. They were chaperoned by an actual gaucho.
Earning his paycheck
So it was not surprising to me when JoJo sent Alex packing. It was actually a truly touching moment, seeing someone open up and share a piece of themselves while watching JoJo realize her feelings were on camera. We literally get to see the emotions go through her face as she comes to the realization that Alex is not her prince charming.
Also, bye to James Taylor. I know he was a fan favorite, but I found his whole shtick to be vaguely manipulative. He acts as this guy who never gets the girl, but in the process of doing so he’s (trying) to get the girl. Can we forget the infamous poker card shade James threw at Jordan, in which he called Jordan entitled, then immediately followed it up with a request for a kiss?
Is the plan here to make her feel sorry for him, and then keep him around out of pity? Does he want to confuse her into kissing him? Does he just want as many kisses as possible? And what was up with him throwing Robby under the bus last week (I still can’t figure out if Robby was actually checking out Argentinian women or not and I also don’t care if he was).
So although some may be sad, I’m not sad to see James T. go. Maybe we’ll see him in Paradise.
So we’re down to the final four. Jordan, Luke, Robby, and Chase. I have been suspicious of Jordan from the beginning, but really appreciated him fronting the issues with his family before the hometown date. Guys, I’m such a Luke fan. He’s just been steady, calm, and you can really see the sparks. I can take or leave Robby and Chase. Robby is a little weird about not wearing socks and his footwear choices in general:
Hotel slippers, bold move
Put. On. Your. Shoes.
Chase is also a dark horse in this competition. He also has a very inexpressive face, which makes me laugh when he says things like how he’s angry, or shocked, or sad. To me, he looks the same.
Which brings us to Hometowns. We’re at the part of the season where things start to become “real” for the contestants, and it’s always fascinating watching this part of the journey. As always, my rankings:
- Jordan – I think he’s still number one for JoJo
- Luke – I wish he was number one for JoJo
- Robby – Meh
- Chase – Meh